You can never be too careful!

Dear Phil,

Important Security Notice

I am very disappointed to report that Monday afternoon some thieves stole a pair of trousers from the men's changing room and as a consequence then stole a car with the keys that were in the pocket and used the swipecard from the wallet to exit the car park and then managed to use the cards in the wallet for cash and other spending.

PLEASE would everyone make sure that they leave NO valuables accessible to anyone else as these crooks are very swift to seize upon such things. There are lockers available for temporary use with a £1 coin and there are even some lockers available to rent. If anyone asks you to help them get out of the gate and you do not know them send them to the office or the bar - please do not just let them out.

PLEASE BE AWARE AND TAKE CARE.

                                             TRUE CONVERSATION

“Can you tell me the code for getting out of the gate please; I am at the wrong Golf Club”.

(There is a Golf Club adjoining this one and another within a mile).

“Sorry! You may be stealing a car for all I now”.

“You must be joking! If I wanted to steal a car do you really believe I would steal this thing: it’s got over a hundred and twenty thousand miles on the clock.”

I could see that even Ford would have been embarrassed to acknowledge it was one of theirs; I gave him the code.

                                                                                                               

A dummy run?   I thought at the time what a nice pair of trousers he was wearing!